“My 4 year old daughter is very smart and creative, but sometimes has trouble focusing and following rules in preschool and at home. We haven’t yet found her niche, or what she really loves to do. How do we encourage her intuitiveness and creativity while still making sure she succeeds in school and other social situations?”
The first thing to understand is that your daughter is young enough to be very connected to the other side. While she may not have the words to communicate this, nonetheless she has a foothold in both places. This is a wonderful, imaginative time indeed!
I see her not following rules because she is sometimes ahead of the game. She’s already thinking outside the box, and can’t understand why she has to conform to a certain set of experiences. While we do need rules in a civilized society, sometimes the “boxes” we create for our children can seem a little overwhelming.
Since your daughter has a magnificent imagination, expressing herself may be a bit difficult.
I am looking forward to the day when we treat our children as they are. Today, we take great strides to make them all fit into a certain “mold”—and when they don’t, we often think we’ve done something wrong. Children are not all the same emotionally and this is quite alright! I was very much like your daughter as a child, so I know children who are on a different road will find their way. There are dedicated teachers trying to change our current paradigm with some success, but we still need more innovative ideas for spirit growth. For now, this can begin at home. It looks like you are well aware of this.
I suggest you introduce some form of meditation or “quiet time” before a story or rest period. Create some good conscious breathing with closed eyes. When you notice a lack of focus in your child, or when she is having trouble following rules, ask her what she is doing or thinking. Like the old saying, “out of the mouth of babes”, she may give an answer that will astound you.
Introduce some form of meditation or “quiet time”
before a story or rest period.
Since your daughter has a magnificent imagination, expressing herself may be a bit difficult. She just seems to need a little more attention—and has her own way of reminding others of this fact. Again, allow her to speak freely, and be attentive. Maybe she will share her thoughts and feelings through pictures, or maybe she just wants to spend a little more alone time with you. Do this with your child even when you think you are “too busy”. Take her on a trip in the car to run an errand. Let her talk with no interruption, and really listen to what she has to say. This will pay off in the long term. I’m betting she has some giant wisdom there that will benefit you both!
Every child is unique and yet connected to a much bigger picture. It’s up to us to nurture their uniqueness yet continue to encourage the connection.
– Becky
